To Each Their Own....

I've been around long enough to realize that life is funny. Not always, 'ha, ha' funny, but 'odd' funny. I watched a video with a friend today, that had wonderful typography, and was about education is more then going to school. This is true. School has it's place, it helps in many ways, but does it show us our true potential? Not often. Mostly do to the fact that if you don't fit in a box that helps the school, then the school is not really helping you. You just become one of the nameless numbers meant to fill it's ranks.

A lot of teachers who started out with the idea to reach a child, mold the minds of many are sadly having or have had their dreams dashed do to the politics of school districts and school boards. Parents are also creating a state of school where teaching kids, holding them accountable and learning consequence seems to be a crime. Oh and we can't forget the increasingly dumb reasons to sue school and the wonderfully smart judges that have aloud it. (Please know I'm being very sarcastic here.) Now, I'm not saying all teachers are great or are not great, or that all schools are or are not wonderful. What I am saying is, if you put nothing in, you get nothing out and school politics that are now working like government politics has got to go!

The human experiment has either failed or is somehow working, although I'd love to know how. After all, you can't gauge this by our so 'non'-judgmental media. How can we take there word on anything? Maybe if they didn't get paid and just did it for the news...like they claim, but they are now so concerned with there next money maker they stretch everything. They can't wait to tell us how bad racism is still today, leaving off all the good or non-racist people. And lets not forget another good hot topic issue when news is slow because people weren't so bad, Women's rights!  Yes, because women are still told daily how to marry, where they can or can not go and are seen so stupid they are not aloud to vote. Yes, some racist things do go on, but lets be honest with ourselves please, All ethnic groups  have these issue with others and within their own 'groups'. Same with women's rights, women have so many rights we are board and are trying to create men into women. Please, stop that by the way. I'm not a man hater nor do I want to sleep with women. Women are nuts and having me in my head is fine. All men do not need to be a women. Just saying.  So....why are we pretending that this weeks most important, 'blah, blah' issue is the most important thing and the media can't possibly spin anything? Instead of looking at it saying, 'hummm.....they must need money this week'.

My family is going through some stupid crap, all because the one's sitting in the big chairs that tell us how much they love their workers, couldn't wait to fire him and layoff another when they called them out on their bull-crap.  It's so easy for them to do that. High in the ivory tower. Why is it that the backs of the people they stepped on to each the ivory tower are so worthless to the ivory tower people? Oh, right, because we allow it. Why? Because for some reason we are so afraid to loss our job well let them write us up on false write-ups so we can continue to be underpaid. Why is that again?? How easily we forget that nothing changes unless we change it. Stand together or crumble apart. Right now we chose crumble it would seem.

We can pretend, but what the hell is America so proud of anymore? Wonderful boss that care? No. People that look out for their neighbor? Not normally. OH, I know, we at least have a government that cares for the people, works For the people and doesn't see us as nameless cattle that is to stupid to realize that we are expendable. No....wait. We are cattle that the government uses and gauges us as acceptable losses. When convenient. The rich once again dictating life. How....refreshing.

When does Suicide become Mercy?

Can suicide be merciful? Or Death? Death, without the word of killing, suicide, or murder is often seen as mercy. When someone does who has been in pain or sick we say, they are, 'in a better place', or 'at least the pain has stopped.' Yet, when someone kills themselves when they are tired of what seems to be a very long and never changing cycle, it's wrong. We don't want to admit that what they where going through before they committed Suicide was pain. Lots of pain. Pain is more then a feeling, or nerves hitting our bodies, it's a state of many factors. 

 Oddly, I'm not saying we should all jump off the life train. We miss so much when we are not here, but how can you condemn someone for jumping off, when all they know is pain? We save our pets from pain, we ask for doctors to stop keeping our friends or family alive if there is nothing else that can be done and all the pain meds do nothing, but put new pain on top of old. So what is wrong with choosing the end? Isn't death mercy?

Or is it only mercy as long as we do not choose it. God's will must be done. So, as long as it's a doctor that keeps us alive or our family keeps us alive with machines,  then we, 'pull the plug' so to speak...or rather literally, really, that's okay. Because, we didn't chose it. That's Mercy.

Why do we fear death so? Even those that love and believe in God. Why fear it? God gave us a wonderful gift and a horrible cruse. Freedom of choice. Yet, when we use it, we are wrong. Well, if you use it in any way the people who work from and with fear, say you shouldn't. Then, you are wrong.

You know, God had 10 commandments, and they were really important laws. These were not wishy-washy, or long winded or even code. They were easy. Easy to understand and really not hard to follow. The ground work for all human right and wrong. And nowhere does it say, you should not commit suicide. 

Now, yes it says, 'you shall not Murder.' Not 'Kill' but 'Murder'. Big difference. Is killing one's self Murder or Killing? There is a time for killing after all. Forgiveness, sadness, happy, we have time for all of them and there is a time for all things. Is suicide one of these things? Can there be a time for it?

Yes. If you look at all the people that do so to their pets, believe that enough suffering in a pain riddled, never to get better way, is a good time to help someone Kill, themselves or another. Again, which leads us back to, pain.

Depression is Pain. A pain that does not show physically. It can be so very real, and no, you can't just "Get Over It." As so many people like to say. The most unhelpful wording in our human tong I might add. Christens like to say, "believe in God and all things will work out. There is a plan." I'm not really disputing that God may or may not have a plan, but lets face it, Paul, Peter, John and the other important people had it easy. Jesus was right there and talked to them, it's a lot easier to believe when God tells you face to face. Heck, even Mosses had a bush. 

Some day's 'Gods plan' really helps me, other days....it doesn't. When you start to feel no matter what you do it must be wrong because it's not working out, how can you think God's plan is working? Then someone says "It's you, you just aren’t' listening." Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know I needed a code book to hear God. No, the sad truth is, sometimes the plan is.....simply, it's not your fault, the world sucks, and being that God, gave us free choice, we get to live the evil choices of the world.

What do I mean. A bad boss. We have all had them. They get to treat you like crap, not give you raises, and on top of that, more often then not, family will even say, 'hey it's better then no money'. And you, like so many others before and after get to lose even more of your self worth more and more and more, day after day, until it's painful to work. Then you realize all that money you're working for, for a boss that treats you like crap is barely paying your way. No trips, hardly any fun time because your working for a lot less then your worth. And sadly, family and friends tell you, either 'get a new job' or 'put up with it, because it's better then no money'. Is it?

If this is really all there is? Then isn't Suicide not an act of Murder, but a killing of Mercy? One that only the person involved can make. When is it Mercy....

Or...is the justifying of such a complex subject the cry of help from someone that doesn't want to admit the amount of depression they are going through? Not only for life, but for their family. Watching the same cycle happen in their life and family life no matter how hard they and their family try? .....where is God? You pray...you ask...and just when you hope it will be good, the rug is pulled....again.

When can you say, "No more. I'm done." Or....is death feared not because of what may or may not be there, but because we aren't suppose to choose it? Can we check out early? Not if you believe God has his hand on all things. Then, your suicide was your predetermined death. Your time to go. That's what people tell people when they lose some one unexpectedly. "It's their time."

What does that mean? 'Their Time.' I can think of a 100 ways I wouldn't want to die, and yet, people have, and you'd call it, 'their time'? Interesting. We are a people of contradictions. Yet....we won't admit it. And with that statement, I'm proving my point.

God is real. That is a comfort, but not always in a, 'I'm feeling great and the song birds sing all around me' kind of way. No. Sometimes is a grounding anger of. "Why won't you fix this?!" and the, "I need you to fix this as I don't know what to do ANYMORE." Feeling. Yet, we aren't suppose to get mad at God? Why?

I didn't choose Earth to live on. No one did. The sin of the World was put on the shoulders of two innocent people. I'm not saying dumb people. I for one wouldn't be surprised to find that Adam and Eve could not only work a computer, but teach us a thing or two. No. They were innocent. Carefree. They didn't know what evil was, or lying, or even deception. Yet....if instead of listening to a new comer and would have trusted the rule God set out...this paper would probably not even be needed. No sin....no reason to go through hard times.

But, they did, so here we are. Not only did they eat, they lied, hid and where shamed by what they did. So now, so is the world. We are to be shamed when we, who may not be doing anything wrong, just having a world of....'What am I doing wrong and is it me' questions laid at our feet.

After a while, no matter what you think...you start to wonder. Is it me? Sometimes the answer is a resounding 'YES', Stop making bad choices!! But that’s so easy. When it really is you; however, what if it's not. What if it's all the people that choose sin first. 'Bad', 'Me First' crap. You get to go along for the ride, whether you choose it or not.

And your life is Pain. Depression, so many ups and downs you lose count. Not from lack of trying....but from the sin of humans around you. Not even family want to think it's not you...after a while. You see, if they have not gone through it for years...or even months where it really shook them to never forget, well it can be hard for them to remember, 'We don't control every aspect of our lives'. No matter how much we may want to. God is also a force, as is the world.

I'm not sure if there is just more evil humans then good, or if this ramped disregard across the board is from the lack of ethics being taught now then 100 years ago. It was not perfect, it never is, but people did try to be good as there word. No matter who they talked to. Greed has always kept the worker down, but an honest man got an honest day's work. And back then, it was noticed, even expected. If only we could put today's laws in with good ethics of yesteryear.

Family stuck together. I'm not saying all family suck or are heartless. No. Just it was the norm for them to help out, listen, and work with you. And you in turn helped them. Now, it's a hit and miss. More often then not. During WWII, people didn't have Wic, or DSHS to get help. They had people. People that would take all day to bake bread for other people to get nothing back but, a simple, 'Thank-you'. Or that gathered clothes, toys, and other needs for people. This was DSHS of it's time. People helping people. Sadly we not only say, 'go over there for help, you're bothering me' but we also say, 'man all anyone wants that is on DSHS is a free ride from my pocket.' The only ones that are like that are the ones that refuse to get any job and think they deserve a pay check because someone or something did something to them, or their family from either their childhood or at the beginning of time. Therefor, it's everyone's problem. No it isn't.

Evil doesn’t have to be a nice killer or rapist. That kind of evil is easy to spot. It stands out and say's, 'here I am'. No, the worst ones are the ones that go to church, and then treat their workers like crap. Or the boss that sees the problems, hears the complains yet lets the person keep on, keep on. It's even all the people that say, 'well, that's just the way it is.' No...it's not. Not if you don't let it. Remember the revolution, all of them? People stood up, black, white, women, man, etc. And said, 'enough'. So no, it isn't just the way it has to be.

To see Evil and do nothing, is in itself an act of Evil. And we use a lot of ways to justify doing nothing! Christians don't say mean things. Really? Okay....then why are so many talking behind peoples backs.  Godly people can't wait to talk about their enemies. One show of this is in the hot topic issue of today. Gays. I don't believe being Gay is something you are born with or is normal. It's a choice. And most often a part of some trauma as a kid or adult and that the new push is to teach young kids it's okay and normal to be gay. And then society wonders why we have identity issues.

(Edit! I said that the verse about sin was in Luke, it's not. It's 1 John 5:17 NLT is what I'm reading from. I'd rather fix )

However, do I think all gay's are Hell bound. No. That is one Sin in many. Sin, is Sin. John said it best. 'All wicked actions are sin, but not every sin leads to death'. (However you should still read John, that way you can get the whole story and form your own thoughts.  Look at more then one line, in one part of a book. I put one piece out there and my thoughts on it. Now go get your own thoughts.)

I believe Luke had a point and a very important one. A simple line with a lot of meaning and no guide to know what is death and what is not. But, that doesn't mean you have free rain, there is no 'Sin Guide'. We must still try to do our best. After all, the bible doesn't contradict it's self, unless you keep only reading parts of it. I'm not saying you need to know all of it right now, but read the story all around the lines that have been pointed out. Get a broader picture. Don't look to prove your point, look to disapprove it, if that is all you can do to open your mind. My opinion.

I think Sin is a very personal thing. Is there some Sin that I think is kinda a Hell worthy Ticket...Yes. And IF I did them....I'd expect that ticket. However, God himself is Mercy. As Christens we are suppose to let someone know that God sees their action as sin, then let it go. Well, not so much let it go, I think it depends on your calling and whether or not God is using you to help. Sometimes it's quick, sometimes is just guidance. He calls to our hearts, if we listen. But, some subjects as a broadness that shouldn't just have one quick overall Hell answer and Gay is one of them. Why can't we try that same mercy? We can't always, but we can try.

So....when is it okay to commit suicide? Or....is the fear that God's plan is not for you to die at your own hand, but death must always be out of your control greater then anything we believe. After all, even most atheists think suicide is not the way. Funny, coming from a group of people that already believe we are but, accidents. So why should it matter?

Maybe the questions is....when does death become mercy? Or....is death a problem when done by your own hands, but better if death comes from a stranger, doctor, or even an accident. Is that somehow better and more acceptable? Is murder by another better then suicide. Is suicide so bad, so evil and self serving that you'd rather them be murdered, then them choosing to die? Why is ending the pain that the sin of the world is never okay? Unless it is not by your own hand.

'Nothing ever stays the same'. 'Have Faith'. Sunday school answers. Those words are not always helpful. They come quickly to the tong. Don't be quick to speak them, speak what is truly needed by listening, not talking at them. But too. Or, say nothing and hold and pray with them and maybe then, those words will have so much more meaning.

Sometimes we need God's word the most is when we truly feel we are out of calling distance. Sometimes it's not a lack of faith that leads to death, but a tiredness of waiting for change. The endless fighting. How much fight can one have when you keep fighting the same battle...over and over. It's not that you don't want to ask Jesus or God to fill you and give you strength, you just get tired of asking.

That is true depression...true tiredness....true reason for asking for Mercy. Death. Not a longing to die...only a longing for change. For the same cycle to end. The fight to be over. One can get so tired....so tired, of the endless battle of sin. Not of people, of of the world. Not even of the devil...he is such a small player in a much bigger pie. He has lost, he is only going to take any down with him he can. No the sad reality is humans choose evil acts and deeds all on their own. We just don't like to admit it. Then, the devil only adds to it and helps us justify the act until we no longer need him to help. But, we still choose to listen. With the death of Jesus, we are no longer a slave to sin, but choose it. I believe it was either Paul or John that spoke of that.

Bad bosses, people that think they can be mean just because, they think they can be mean, the all about me's, they all choose it. Just like those that think of others, try to be good even in the mist of trial after trial. My opinion is that suicide is not as simple as to make the grand claim that it is always all about the that one selfish person. Not always. It's deeper. Like a cutter who cuts. They don’t cut to get away from pain, the cut to feel the pain they can't express or fix and it makes them feel better.

Suicide is sometimes that. A cut. A deep cut. That can be fixed when no other cuts will do. But, is it Mercy?

Or, is it the deluded thought of depression and desperation that leads to those thoughts? So many questions....So many concerns. Yet....no answers.

What is God's mercy? Is death His only Mercy? Or....can there ever be something more then just light at an end of a very long tunnel? Or, is life also Mercy? Can it be that living can be the answer? Not because people tell us Death is bad, but because you never know what you may have missed. That is, if one believes that death can be intercepted and God's plan can be set different do to choice. God can and has saved us, I think our mental state has a lot to do with that; however, if you truly want death, he'll let you choose it. Just like Sin. Yet, can mercy, God's mercy be death? A debate of the ages. One that this paper will not end, or finish. But, somehow feels better putting down.

Now, I think I'll finish and relax with a cup of hot coco. Relax and remember what is good in life. For that is what we need sometimes as humans. Find our good place for we are surrounded by the worlds bad place.

America & the Flag...

Old Glory...Red, White, & Blue....the American Flag...

When we see these names, any true American feels a sense of pride.  It stands for freedom, it stands for the right to believe in God. It stands for not wanting undo Taxation. Not that we wouldn't pay taxes, but that they wouldn't be unfair &extremely high. (I think that got lost.)

People, a huge number of people died to give us freedom, and to keep freedom. America has welcomed all people on to her shores, even enemies. We, America, for all the bad we see on TV, in reality, we have made a peace that no other country could do. We live next to people of all ethnic groups, faiths, and thoughts and as America's we see very little fights in most of our back-doors. The only seeds that do bad, are Evil seeds and Media that must report things that will only insight and spreed those seeds.

It's so easy for Evil to spread, to make America seem like it is not a melting pot, but a boiling chaotic pot of people; because we don't talk with our neighbors anymore. We may wave and say hello, but we don't talk with them. And I'm not just talking about the Ethnic group that you either share or identify with the most, but the Ethnic group you don't share or identify with. How could we have so many, or at least be lead to believe, that so many ethnic groups are at war, if we talked to each other?

Hate breeds hate, Love breeds love. Freedom comes at a price, high price. When I look around at the law that passed for Gay marriage a part of me says, Okay, legally they have that right. After all men & women fought, fight and die so we all can have that freedom. Here is the twist, it's not the legal part I and most of the people that disagree with the new law have, it's the simple fact that Two things just happened. Let me brake this down in a very simple way.

One: Marriage, defined by God and under God is a man & a women. Period. That was the Issue of Marriage, not the Union of Laws, but the defined word of Marriage. If, a compromise of not calling a Gay Marriage, Marriage, but a Union on the law with the same rights, then as for the legal part, most would have been fine. But, as normal, this didn't happen. No, no, we can't have Compromise.

Two: You are making all those that don't agree with being Gay and saying they have to. Hummm...lets look at normal Nature. How many creatures are attracted to the same sex? None that I can think of. The only things out there that don't need a male or female is A-sexual, and since they don't need a partner as far as I have ever read or known, they don't look for one either. So, just looking at it that way, those that don't agree, and express it in a peaceful manner, should be able to have that right.

Freedom of speech, is well, we take a lot of liberties with it. Regardless, all in all it should really be called Freedom of opinions and voicing those opinions respectfully and without retaliation and shouldn't be retaliated on.

Once the opinions have been spoken, and  lets be honest, sometimes depending on the opinion there isn't a clear right or wrong answer, both parties could be right to a point,  we need to come up with a solution or compromise.

Compromise, now that's something you don't see much anymore. Not true compromise that is meant to see eye to eye and yet do no harm or evil. You see, Churches, and those that believe Gay is wrong, should be able to follow those believes without people saying they are wrong, just like those that believe differently want to do.

This is brings us back to our freedom of rights and sadly, taking the power out of the states hands, in someways is good if you look only at the legal side of what marriage is, but in the end really opens up a much more damaging things. The flag stands for Freedom, what freedom is there when you take out choice? You take out the voice of the people when this is not a cut and dry issue of evil or wrong. The true issue wasn't the legal issue of Marriage but the name and relation the word marriage holds.

We can't be mad for the idea that a Gay couple wishes to marry, the very fact that we are teaching children that Gay is okay and you should be Gay, is creating those that most likely never would have been Gay to be so now. I've heard Gay people say they hope the children they raise are gay when they grow up. You can disagree, but basic phycology can tell you if you tell something to someone long enough, well it's going to stick.  So, the mere fact that the law passed isn't the problem, it's what it will be used to take the rights away from others.

You see, people don't want equal, they don't want justice, they want what's good for them. Now, I know it may sound that's what I'm saying. No. I'm not saying lets not have these things. Freedom is a double age sword, just like choice. God gave us the choice for good and bad. Freedom comes with bad freedoms. We have laws to, hopefully, protect us from those that believe doing harm is a choice and freedom they should have. Is murder as bad as Gay marriage? 98% of people on both sides of the issue would most likely say, no, Gay marriage is not as bad as Murder, rape, or child pornography.  So, we all mostly agree and a law is put in place. A good law.

But, this isn't about that, no. This is about opinion. Just like the Flag deal. The Confederate Flag is also a hot button issue. Why? Because someone said it was. Not because it really is. The Confederate flag did not stand for Slavery. Sorry folks, that's just an issue the North brought up to win, and it worked. The north had slaves too. What so many people that are crying out and saying it's heritage, is forgetting to say is the South wanted to be it's own nation because they didn't like what the North was doing politically. Now, the North was not innocent in all this and still isn't. The North has more racial problems today then the South, but who wants to admit that? I'm not saying that the Civil War had a bad outcome per-say, but it wasn't about Civil Rights. No matter how you want to color history.

So once again what this whole thing is about is Opinion. Is the Confederate Flag something that really needs a law? No. If you want to look at something and see hate, you will. ISIS sees our Flag as hate, they burn it, use it in horrible things, yet we are mad because of the Confederate Flag, which has nothing to do with America as a whole, and is being misrepresented? This is what we are going to get hot about, not the American flag or the Billions of people being killed by ISIS.

Mostly Christians & Jews, by the way. No, we have to bicker about issues that could all be dealt with if we could have a little respect and if BOTH sides would say, "Yes, we have both done wrong and we both have people that are bad." The Gay rights would be something we could tolerate, (not the Sin, but the choice. As a Christian I do not believe that choosing to be Gay is a right thing, however, it is not my place to place judgment only tell you what I feel and respect your choice. I only ask you do the same); however, if they would stop saying it's natural & right. I'm sorry it's not.  But, as I said, my job isn't to correct Sin, only let you know  that it is sin and then leave it up to God. One also should not turn from you or reject you, but show you what kidness is. That is the true calling of a true Christian, and should be the calling of each American out there, regardless of what your opinion is.

America, a busting pot of difference that brought us such wonderful things when we work together. A Country that was suppose to be 'under God'. America which is suppose to be beautiful.  Yet, if the very people dieing for us can't believe what they want, in God, in whatever form, as long as they mean no harm to others, then what kind of Freedom do we really have? What kind of America do we really have?

I can't even remember the last time I heard 'God bless the U.S.A' on the radio. Yet, I heard it today in Church! Church is where I hear the most patriotic songs. So, tell me, how is it that those that believe in God, are the ones against America, if that's where you see the most pride? Church is not perfect...only God is. Humans run Churches and they are not perfect. Then you have those that are very bad people calling themselves Christians, who aren't, just like Bad people can be Gay, Black, White or any other color, creed, etc.

America should be above it. Laws should only be put in place when it truly benefits America. Not when, under the guise of something else, we give away more of our freedoms. Obama no more really believes in Gays being normal then he did when he renounced it. If Obama really believed in freedom and equal rights, then hate crimes wouldn't be just when it's white on black, or guy, but when it involves any group. If he or any politician really wanted what was best for AMERICA they would stop spreading hate through media. A long time ago, we would have said if you can't look at the whole truth, then don't bring it before the Court. After all it's it "The whole truth & Nothing but the Truth under GOD?" Yet, we keep saying God has no place. If courts where truly just, they wouldn't let women hurt men for not other reason then they can, and men wouldn't be allowed to sit in jail and create gangs.

No, the idea of America, what it's suppose to be, what it started out to be, makes me tear up. But so does, what it is becoming when we do nothing to fix the in-fighting & pettiness. When we don't give freedom to the very people dieing so we can have it, and when we are so consumed on things that shouldn't be but a footnote, while we let real evil go free.

The only Flag America should care about is the American one. The only fight we should really have is with ISIS. America may not be perfect, but if people would communicate, and stop saying like, 'lets look after our own' I hear that from blacks a lot. Then how can we ever come together as a country. But then...Whites, I'm sorry to say are the only ones as a whole, when asked if they are American say yes. There is no African, Mexican, Asian, etc. attached to American. Just American.  If you are part of this country, love this country, respect this country, then you are AMERICAN, not matter what Ethic background you have.

Now, why can't we just except that? Wouldn't that be at least a start? Freedom....

.....Does it still exist? Does America? Or are we just a bunch of people with grudges and pity differences with no compromises? Are we a people that allow the evil to make a mockery of all the good people from each ethnic group? Many ask...is God dead? I ask...is America dead?